What Ford Motor Co. needs is more top execs with nicknames. You know, like "Red" Poling. At least that's the theory of one Ford lifer who's been there since "Hank the Deuce" was CEO.

Technically, "Hank the Deuce" isn't a nickname. It's the way some people refer to Henry Ford II, just as some call Jacques Nasser "Jac the Knife" because he was a cost-cutter.

In addition to Harold "Red" Poling, there also was Charles B. "Tex" Thornton, the former army colonel who led the 10 "Whiz Kids" into Ford after World War II.

But not all nicknames carry the same weight.

Semon Knudsen's nickname, "Bunkie," seems a little trite when you compare it to the "Big Bill" moniker his father, William Signius Knudsen carried. Big Bill was an exec at Ford and General Motors as well as a lieutenant general in the army during WWII.

A number of Ford leaders have been called by diminutives, like Phil Caldwell, Don Petersen and Alex Trotman. And of course William Clay Ford Jr. has been known as Billy and Bill.

But those don't count.

The best nicknames are the ones your buddies hang on you because you've earned them.

So let's see if we can come up with bona fide nicknames for Bill Ford and new Ford CEO Alan Mulally.

Hmmm. Bill Ford plays hockey, so he might be "Slapshot" or "Killer" or "Rocket" or "Gump." Or maybe something more generic like "Boards" or "Skates" or "Stick."

He helps run the Detroit Lions football team, so maybe he's "Skipper" or "Skip" or "Top Cat" or "King."

Alan Mulally hails from aircraft maker Boeing Co., and he's a private pilot, so maybe he ought to be known as "The Captain" or "Flyboy" or "Top Gun."

If you have suggestions, send them to me with a short explanation. We'll publish the best ones, so please don't be snarky or mean-spirited.

You may e-mail Edward Lapham at [email protected]

Dear Ed,

In response to your request for nicknames, I respectfully offer the

following:

Sir William the Lionheart (even at 0-3) & Alan "Blue Skywalker" (may the

Force be with him).

In support thereof:

Sir William the Lionheart of Ford (Fix Or Retire Disgracefully), having

previously enlisted the support of Robin Hood (Robbin' the

Brotherhood...UAW), Little Jacques, and Friar Tuck (aka...Prior Truck) now

sits upon the family throne once occupied by King Henry II. As he launches

yet another Car Crusade, he empowers "Man of La Mantra", who is hopefully

more than a Don Coyote howling at the Blue Oval. To be successfull in his

quest, he must work past tilting at Windstars and hopefully then create

through profitability, the friendly but elusive, Blue Sky.

The second choice was William "Cray" as his life recently has been a box of

Crayons. Seeing "Red", he didn't raise "White", wasn't "Yellow", paid the

"Green" attempting to get "Black", and create "Blue".

Meanwhile, in our Tale of Two Companies, "Rickin' Little" (whose Blue Sky

has definitely fallen) meets on Bastille Day to manufacture a Renault

Alliance in hopes of a far, far better thing to do. As employees, retirees,

dealers, suppliers, and customers feel the Grapes of Wagoner, they search

for the Ghost of Al Sloan.

Your Friend in Flint,

Buickman

Founder

www.GeneralWatch.com

Dear Ed,

In response to your request for nicknames, I respectfully offer the

following:

Sir William the Lionheart (even at 0-3) & Alan "Blue Skywalker" (may the

Force be with him).

In support thereof:

Sir William the Lionheart of Ford (Fix Or Retire Disgracefully), having

previously enlisted the support of Robin Hood (Robbin' the

Brotherhood...UAW), Little Jacques, and Friar Tuck (aka...Prior Truck) now

sits upon the family throne once occupied by King Henry II. As he launches

yet another Car Crusade, he empowers "Man of La Mantra", who is hopefully

more than a Don Coyote howling at the Blue Oval. To be successfull in his

quest, he must work past tilting at Windstars and hopefully then create

through profitability, the friendly but elusive, Blue Sky.

The second choice was William "Cray" as his life recently has been a box of

Crayons. Seeing "Red", he didn't raise "White", wasn't "Yellow", paid the

"Green" attempting to get "Black", and create "Blue".

Meanwhile, in our Tale of Two Companies, "Rickin' Little" (whose Blue Sky

has definitely fallen) meets on Bastille Day to manufacture a Renault

Alliance in hopes of a far, far better thing to do. As employees, retirees,

dealers, suppliers, and customers feel the Grapes of Wagoner, they search

for the Ghost of Al Sloan.

Your Friend in Flint,

Buickman

Founder

www.GeneralWatch.com

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thats pretty lame mr. bvickman. not as bad as rickin little, that takes the

proverbial josh...i mean cake.

going along the lines of the airplane analogy, nose dive is the first thing that comes to mind but alas is somewhat meanspirited, unless of course he pulls out...now pull out wouldnt be bad but i believe it has some colloquial connotations to it so hows about "g-force".

it kind of speaks for itself --it represents the companies wicked skid but also conjures up the power that is needed to right fmc back on course...it also can take on an urban hipness the rappers might appreciate. like the mkz.

jonah also came to mind but maybe i can just sleep on it.

HOW BOUT ASS KICKER?

?????