Here are three proven methods for removing any nasty wart.

You got to go all by yourself, to the

middle of the woods, where you know

there's a spunk-water stump, and just as

it's midnight you back up against the

stump and jam your hand in and say:

'Barley-corn, barley-corn, injun-meal

shorts,Spunk-water, spunk-water, swaller

these warts,'and then walk away quick,

eleven steps, with your eyes shut, and

then turn around three times and walk

home without speaking to anybody.

Because if you speak the charm's busted.

You take and split the bean, and cut the

wart so as to get some blood, and then

you put the blood on one piece of the

bean and take and dig a hole and bury it

'bout midnight at the crossroads in the

dark of the moon, and then you burn up

the rest of the bean. You see that piece

that's got the blood on it will keep

drawing and drawing, trying to fetch the

other piece to it, and so that helps the

blood to draw the wart, and pretty soon

off she comes.

you take your cat and go and get in the

graveyard 'long about midnight when

somebody that was wicked has been

buried; and when it's midnight a devil

will come, or maybe two or three, but

you can't see 'em, you can only hear

something like the wind, or maybe hear

'em talk; and when they're taking that

feller away, you heave your cat after

'em and say, 'Devil follow corpse, cat

follow devil, warts follow cat, I'm done

with ye!' That'll fetch any wart."

Randomly came across this in my email inbox. Thought it was funny, so here I am posting it.

Satty, sounds like it's worth a try, right? Remember you were telling me about those warts suddenly appearing on your peepee?

i suppose this works too...

That's downright medieval.