Jump to content

Featured Replies

12 minutes ago, David said:

Q: What is the first thing a Fraternity boy does in the Morning?

A: Changes his sheets!

I like the symmetry here, David.

  • Replies 401
  • Views 52.2k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • trinacriabob
    trinacriabob

    "A poor Republican is like a cow that is pro-leather" . . . Aw shucks, I already posted this one before.

  • surreal1272
    surreal1272

    “Mr. President, we have Stormy Daniels on line one” LMMFAO! You have to be high out of your mind to act like the p**** grabber himself has been “faithful”. That’s the best joke of the thread

  • Drew Dowdell
    Drew Dowdell

    Did you know that the Secret Service can't yell "GET DOWN!!" at the President anymore in the event of an attack?               They have to yell, "DONALD, DUCK!

Posted Images

On 2/22/2021 at 7:52 AM, A Horse With No Name said:

May be an image of 1 person and text that says 'It's hard to win an argument with a smart person, but it's damn near impossible to win an argument with a stupid person. -Bill Murray'

 

How did I miss this?  It again reinforces the notion of what it's like to deal with the "don't know how much they don't know" crowd.

Clearly an Alpha Male, from an actual fashion show...

May be an image of 1 person

May be an image of 1 person

May be an image of one or more people and people standing

May be an image of 1 person, standing and footwear

May be an image of 2 people, people standing, footwear and indoor

May be an image of 5 people, people standing and footwear

May be an image of 1 person, standing and footwear

This is far more about ignorance than it is political, but is it ever funny.  I still remember it, so I looked for it ...

rosh-hashanah.jpg

15 hours ago, trinacriabob said:

^ Haha. 

Like a Southerner in Atlanta once philosophically said to me, "Every pot has its lid."

This, too, got a down vote from the resident man child?!?  It's a time worn expression.  It means that, for everything and everyone out there, there's a "buyer" or kindred soul.  Or maybe he has never been to Atlanta ...

The Confederate carving on Stone Mountain, about 15 to 20 miles east of downtown Atlanta:

KIMG6721.thumb.JPG.f4300ee154fd9502369f61f98da89d87.JPG

One can see downtown Atlanta's skyscrapers in the distance from atop Stone Mountain:

KIMG6799.thumb.JPG.4c1430bb9edff3200e5d846625a980f5.JPG

One can take a cable sky ride up to the top ... and walk down ... or walk in both directions:

KIMG6767.thumb.JPG.deee082717c91336fec3b68588bdd523.JPG

This is Midtown - not even downtown:

KIMG6524.thumb.JPG.6ee55ed84db5651f8ff34616e775a164.JPG

This is Perimeter - not even downtown:

KIMG6853.thumb.JPG.5ebf383a6feea410d1150c9c92d2b7a1.JPG

This is the soon to open Delta museum, where one of their retired 747-400s will be available to tour:

KIMG6868.thumb.JPG.e3ac788a4013652440bb69178bc51d7e.JPG

In short, it's a very cosmopolitan metro area and full of people who know the score.  Only $50 or so each way when on sale from many Northeastern airports.  Highly recommended to broaden one's horizons.

 

Funny part is, if you need the validation of an explanation for the downvote, it was because of your incessant stereotyping of people, whether it be by geographical region, or any other of your narrow criteria.  You tend to put ppl in a box to satisfy your own needs, at least, per your posts here.

Then you went ahead and further explained yourself, and it relieved the situation.  Only thing preventing me from giving it an upvote was your subsequent namecalling, so it remains a neutral post, in my own view, not necessarily anyone else's.

I have driven by Atlanta, and I have flown over it.  That's as close as I've gotten.  I have had a Coke, but not since they've gone "woke" (or asleep).

Cancel Culture, a hypersensitive version of political correctness, is eroding solidarity faster than ever before.  We've all enabled it, volleyed from our own islands, and it is not good.

13 minutes ago, ocnblu said:

 

Cancel Culture, a hypersensitive version of political correctness, is eroding solidarity faster than ever before.  We've all enabled it, volleyed from our own islands, and it is not good.

The funny thing is some of the biggest 'cancelers' are the phony-ass 'Christian' right wing idiots with their constant calling of boycotts of anything and everything that 'offends' their delicate sensibilities...the mindless sheep that follow Faux News,  etc. 

Edited by Robert Hall

35 minutes ago, ocnblu said:

Funny part is, if you need the validation of an explanation for the downvote, it was because of your incessant stereotyping of people, whether it be by geographical region, or any other of your narrow criteria.  You tend to put ppl in a box to satisfy your own needs, at least, per your posts here.

Then you went ahead and further explained yourself, and it relieved the situation.  Only thing preventing me from giving it an upvote was your subsequent namecalling, so it remains a neutral post, in my own view, not necessarily anyone else's.

I have driven by Atlanta, and I have flown over it.  That's as close as I've gotten.  I have had a Coke, but not since they've gone "woke" (or asleep).

Cancel Culture, a hypersensitive version of political correctness, is eroding solidarity faster than ever before.  We've all enabled it, volleyed from our own islands, and it is not good.

GTFO with that. The folks that you back have been taking part in cancel culture for decades. NFL kneeling? Cancel them? Gay couples on tv? Cancel them? Gays adopting? Cancel that too. We go even farther with conservatives going after music in the 80s (PMRC anyone?) and religious groups trying to cancel things like Dungeons and Dragons. Let’s not forget the rampant censuring taking place amongst the GOP ranks, all because they are mad at other GOP members voting country over party. Just shut the entire F up with your hypocritical nonsense already. No one is buying it. Please though, tell us how YOU don’t stereotype folks here. You’ve done it to me and you’ve done it to there’s here so tell us why its different for you but not for us. You do a really nice job of stereotyping China so....

Edited by surreal1272

Thanks guys, for saving the thread.  Something to laugh at... FINALLY.. in the "JOKE THREAD".  I've been home with vertigo since Wednesday, and it is no joke, so I needed a bit of cheering.

1 minute ago, ocnblu said:

Thanks guys, for saving the thread.  Something to laugh at... FINALLY.. in the "JOKE THREAD".  I've been home with vertigo since Wednesday, and it is no joke, so I needed a bit of cheering.

Guess you’re just doing what narcissists do. Don’t ever accept your role in anything that you call out on others. Enjoy your recovery.

Thanks, surreal.  I've been on Meclizine per prescription, and that's helped to an extent, now I am Youtubing various exercises.  Sitting at home is not what I do well.

52 minutes ago, ocnblu said:

We've all enabled it, volleyed from our own islands, and it is not good

Repeated for surreal

9 minutes ago, ocnblu said:

Thanks, surreal.  I've been on Meclizine per prescription, and that's helped to an extent, now I am Youtubing various exercises.  Sitting at home is not what I do well.

Let me make it clear that despite our many philosophical differences, I do wish for a speedy recovery from that. I get it from time to time and it is absolutely no fun. I will say to look into the diet and exercise option because most meds for that condition come with a host of nasty side effects. It has helped me.

Edited by surreal1272

Nine ways to deal with a Narcissist.

  1. NO
    1. It is ok to say no if you do not feel comfortable with someone
  2. Stay on Topic and Do not change the subject
    1. A narcissist will use any argument to make it about themselves, and about some mistake or hurt in the past that you have inflicted on them, whether real or perceived.
  3. I will believe it when I see it
    1. Narcissists have a bad habit of over-promising and under-delivering.
  4. I'm not overly emotional. I am assertive, strong willed and impassioned.
    1. Do not let someone else define your emotional state unless they are a licensed medical professional.
  5. I have learned from and move on from my mistakes
    1. Learning from mistakes is the key to being successful in work and in life.
  6. I refuse to be afraid
    1. Fear can be a powerful tool of manipulation, and a narcissist will wield it like a sword.
  7. Slow down there speedy
    1. Narcissists and other manipulators want to rush you into a bad decision that benefits them.
  8. I am not the bad guy here
    1. Narcissists will try to flip any argument or disagreement into why you are the bad guy and they are the sad little victim.
  9. The world does not revolve around you and your needs.
    1. Narcissists are the center of their own universe, but they are not the center of yours.

:rofl:

image.png

7 hours ago, trinacriabob said:

This, too, got a down vote from the resident man child?!?  It's a time worn expression.  It means that, for everything and everyone out there, there's a "buyer" or kindred soul.  Or maybe he has never been to Atlanta ...

The Confederate carving on Stone Mountain, about 15 to 20 miles east of downtown Atlanta:

KIMG6721.thumb.JPG.f4300ee154fd9502369f61f98da89d87.JPG

One can see downtown Atlanta's skyscrapers in the distance from atop Stone Mountain:

KIMG6799.thumb.JPG.4c1430bb9edff3200e5d846625a980f5.JPG

One can take a cable sky ride up to the top ... and walk down ... or walk in both directions:

KIMG6767.thumb.JPG.deee082717c91336fec3b68588bdd523.JPG

This is Midtown - not even downtown:

KIMG6524.thumb.JPG.6ee55ed84db5651f8ff34616e775a164.JPG

This is Perimeter - not even downtown:

KIMG6853.thumb.JPG.5ebf383a6feea410d1150c9c92d2b7a1.JPG

This is the soon to open Delta museum, where one of their retired 747-400s will be available to tour:

KIMG6868.thumb.JPG.e3ac788a4013652440bb69178bc51d7e.JPG

In short, it's a very cosmopolitan metro area and full of people who know the score.  Only $50 or so each way when on sale from many Northeastern airports.  Highly recommended to broaden one's horizons.

 

They need to dynamite both Stone Mountain and Mount Rushmore. 

My new pillows...(not really the couch is tacky!)

May be an image of 2 people and text that says 'My pillow cases came today, much to my family's horror E'

Cookies I eat on that Sofa...

No photo description available.

Not a joke...but cool....untouched Frank Lloyd Wright house for sale. 

https://www.simplemost.com/original-frank-lloyd-wright-minnesota-house-sale/?utm_source=facebook.com&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=sharing&utm_content=article-before&fbclid=IwAR2muWQuUbUYMVMKQiN2upj1YnbhIsCHmmt6UIhpwOeZcNKFX7TH4Ihwf9g

 

f7596cb3a67421cf-12602097-1-750x500.jpeg

On 3/8/2021 at 8:29 AM, ocnblu said:

Funny part is, if you need the validation of an explanation for the downvote, it was because of your incessant stereotyping of people, whether it be by geographical region, or any other of your narrow criteria.  You tend to put ppl in a box to satisfy your own needs, at least, per your posts here.

Then you went ahead and further explained yourself, and it relieved the situation.  Only thing preventing me from giving it an upvote was your subsequent namecalling, so it remains a neutral post, in my own view, not necessarily anyone else's.

I have driven by Atlanta, and I have flown over it.  That's as close as I've gotten.  I have had a Coke, but not since they've gone "woke" (or asleep).

Cancel Culture, a hypersensitive version of political correctness, is eroding solidarity faster than ever before.  We've all enabled it, volleyed from our own islands, and it is not good.

Dude, politics aside, Atlanta is wonderful. You need to visit it in your life time. if you love food, and I know you do....you will be one happy boy eating out and exploring the place. 

Seriously, put gas in the Z71 and drive south...do not pass go, do not collect $200!

May be a meme of 1 person, dog and text

May be an image of text

23 hours ago, ocnblu said:

Thanks guys, for saving the thread.  Something to laugh at... FINALLY.. in the "JOKE THREAD".  I've been home with vertigo since Wednesday, and it is no joke, so I needed a bit of cheering.

Very sorry you suffer from this. Painful. 

Let's keep it to cars guys...too many good things with cars, too many bad things with modern American culture. 

May be an image of outdoors

May be an image of car

Since being politically correct means believing women can do anything men can...

May be an image of 1 person and car

About as political as I will get, I beleive in helmets, but also believe stupid should hurt. 

May be a cartoon of food and text that says 'It all started with bicycle helmets, and now it's "everyone gets a trophy", Kids don't know what it's like to feel pain when they do something stupid. Stupid should hurt.'

The Vasa, more positive vibes for Tuesday....more jokes please. 

No photo description available.

May be a Twitter screenshot of text that says 'Bly @PunkRockPagan Punk: The world is fucked and I'm pissed Emo: The world is fucked and I'm sad Goth: The world is fucked but there's beauty Ska: The world is fucked. trumpet have a 5:42 PM 2/5/21 Twitter Web App 5,201 Retweets 295 Quote Tweets 23.2K Likes'

Maybe we can bring surreal and 'blu together over sandwiches....pickle anyone?

May be an image of text that says 'RETWEET no greater or more precious bond in this life than the one between people who don't want their pickle and people who want an extra extra pickle @Chelsea Fagan'

Meanwhile, the world we think we understand just keeps getting stranger...

May be an image of one or more people and outdoors

Food can be problematic though...

May be a meme of one or more people and text that says 'IT'S ALL FUN AND GAMES UNTIL YOU REALIZE THE SAFE WORD IS "WORCESTERSHIRE" makeameme.org'

May be an image of outdoors and text that says 'YOU CANT PLANT FLOWERS IF YOU HAVENT BOTANY My local nursery went full dad joke.'

May be an image of animal, grass and text that says 'Mardi Gras in Nebraska'

May be an image of text that says 'My family: For sure when he gets a girlfriend, he'll mature. My girlfriend and I:'

May be art of 4 people and food

One more political-ish post, but a good philosophy...

May be an image of text that says 'An environment that is not safe to disagree in is not an environment focused on growth it's an environment focused on control. Wendi Jade Mintelligence'

On 3/8/2021 at 8:29 AM, ocnblu said:

Funny part is, if you need the validation of an explanation for the downvote, it was because of your incessant stereotyping of people, whether it be by geographical region, or any other of your narrow criteria.  You tend to put ppl in a box to satisfy your own needs, at least, per your posts here.

Then you went ahead and further explained yourself, and it relieved the situation.  Only thing preventing me from giving it an upvote was your subsequent namecalling, so it remains a neutral post, in my own view, not necessarily anyone else's.

I have driven by Atlanta, and I have flown over it.  That's as close as I've gotten.  I have had a Coke, but not since they've gone "woke" (or asleep).

Cancel Culture, a hypersensitive version of political correctness, is eroding solidarity faster than ever before.  We've all enabled it, volleyed from our own islands, and it is not good.

One more thought on this, Double standards are part of human nature. It is bred into us, sadly. All we can do is try to overcome it as individuals....

Even nations do this...

r/HistoryMemes - America and Soviet Union be like

Nude guy really messed up the commute on that day. It was freak'in funny and angry trying to get to work for people.

On 3/9/2021 at 9:26 AM, A Horse With No Name said:

May be an image of animal, grass and text that says 'Mardi Gras in Nebraska'

This is funny.  One could look at this several ways ...

She is doing a similar thing that people in a So Cal beach town do once a year when they moon an Amtrak train.

Or,

"Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"

On 3/9/2021 at 11:03 AM, David said:

image.png

Love this view - after Two Union Square (1989) but before the implosion of the Kingdome (2000) and the proliferation of all the pretentious high-rise condo towers after that.  A good time to be in Seattle.

Good morning and Happy Saturday.  Wow, the jokes you hear from grown-ups who went to ... ahem ... parochial schools.  I'll try to clean it up a little bit.

- - - - -

A man is walking along the beach.  He comes across a shiny object in the sand.  As he examines it, it's apparent that it's a genie bottle.  He holds the genie bottle and, suddenly, a genie appears.

The genie tells the man, "Master, I can grant you 3 wishes, and only 3 wishes, and then I will disappear forever.  Think carefully as you can only wish for 3 things."

Man on the beach:  "I want $10 million in the bank."

* cue sound and visual effects of wizardry and magic *

In the man's hands are credible statements for reputable banks with this sum of money in the accounts.

Man on the beach:  “Wow!”

Genie:  "What is your second wish, master?"

Man on the beach:  "I want a 10,000 square foot mansion overlooking the ocean."

* cue sound and visual effects of wizardry and magic *

On the beach, a luxurious mansion appears and, in the man's hands, is the deed showing ownership of this property.

Man on the beach:  “Great!”

Genie:  "What is your third wish, master?  Think carefully as this is your last wish."

Man on the beach:  "I want a d*** that hangs down to my knees."

* cue sound and visual effects of wizardry and magic *

So the genie cut off his legs.

I always laughed even though maybe not the most polite jokes, but funny still is all the Little Johnny Jokes.

Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprimand the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said, “Johnny, when I was a little girl, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that.” Little Johnny looked up and replied, “Well, Ms Smith, you can’t say you weren’t warned.”

Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, “Mommy, can little girls have babies?” “No,” said his mom, “Of course not.” Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, “It’s okay! We can play that game!”

 Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, “Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don’t you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel’s bigger?” Johnny grins and says, “Well, if I took the dime, they’d stop doing it, and so far I’ve made $20!”

23 Little Johnny Jokes That Will Make You Laugh (humoropedia.com)

exploits_of_a_mom.png

This is a good geeky one...

Edited by Robert Hall

5 minutes ago, A Horse With No Name said:

May be an image of 1 person and text that says 'WHEN IT'S SCHOOL PICTURE DAY, BUT YOU GOTTA SELL A 73 CUTLASS SUPREME AT 3:45'

This kid looks a lot like a classmate of mine circa 1980 or so... 

Not a joke, but funny...

May be an image of 2 people and text that says 'DEVON LIVE 3 -MIN READ Woman feels 'discriminated' by KFC over lack of meat-free options 568 410 comments 38 shares Like Comment Share Warren Dobson I can completely sympathise. The other day went to World of Carpet to buy a new telescope but was astounded and disgusted at the complete lack of optical equipment. Its almost as if they'd purposely set out to satisfy the needs of carpet buyers but deliberately snubbed those who weren't. Utter madness. Like Reply 168'

Product fail...

May be an image of text that says 'OYua පනරරය TRIPLEPACK EMBALLAGE TRIPLE TAMPAX Flamin Hot 34 TAMPONS TAMPONES'

One for Ocnblu...proof that people who vote for Democrats are not always that smart...

May be an image of outdoors

1 hour ago, A Horse With No Name said:

One for Ocnblu...proof that people who vote for Democrats are not always that smart...

May be an image of outdoors

Yes look at the state license, more taxation than mine! :P 

On 3/16/2021 at 5:20 PM, David said:

Yes look at the state license, more taxation than mine!  

Hence the nickname "Taxachusetts." 

5 hours ago, trinacriabob said:

Hence the nickname "Taxachusetts." 

Wow, the images online are too funny!

image.png

Who knew Spouse carrying competition was an official sport! :P 

image.png

I could make this a random thought but thought it was more suited to be a joke.

We've heard the expression supporting what is home grown:

"If it ain't Boeing, it ain't going."

Ok, well, the following is a Boeing product, the B-757, and, according to the news, "it ain't going."

1200px-N757AF_at_LAS.jpg

Because if you ain't spending the money to fix its Rolls Royce* engines, then it definitely ain't going.

* hmmm, Rolls Royce ... when home grown Pratt & Whitney is "the other" major supplier of engines for this aircraft

1 hour ago, trinacriabob said:

I could make this a random thought but thought it was more suited to be a joke.

We've heard the expression supporting what is home grown:

"If it ain't Boeing, it ain't going."

Ok, well, the following is a Boeing product, the B-757, and, according to the news, "it ain't going."

1200px-N757AF_at_LAS.jpg

Because if you ain't spending the money to fix its Rolls Royce* engines, then it definitely ain't going.

* hmmm, Rolls Royce ... when home grown Pratt & Whitney is "the other" major supplier of engines for this aircraft

So true, I see the NY airport is now looking to confiscate the plane due to the storage cost, repairs needed and Trump ignoring the airport billing. So funny that the so called Billionaire is unable to pay his bills.

image.png

Seems he is now traveling in a much less luxury style. 

image.png

Photos Reveal Trump's Broken and Grounded Private Plane (businessinsider.com)

OUCH, that Rolls Royce engine is not cheap to fix, but for him it should be pocket change. 

Cheap or broke, interesting and funny.

Joke of the day for this:

image.png

 

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

Who's Online (See full list)

  • There are no registered users currently online