wpbharriet

That will teach you to use prostitutes that accept "1/2 off" coupons.

Oh, get over yourself. Just the other day you were hitting on that young life guard at the beach and and he said he won't date men over 74. Come back home, sweetie. Remember the day I said I would settle for you? You were so happy you ran outside without your walker and wound up tripping over a pile of empty prescription bottles.

Ooh, Harry. You know I love when you try to sound tough. What do you say we take the ol' Malipoo out to Wendys and you can talk tough to me while I spoon feed you you're Prozac. Mmmkay?

Harry! Get your stoner ass home and get back on your god damned meds! You knock up one more cell phone salesman and I'm gonna kick you in the crotch so hard you'll have to stick your finger up your butt and shout "Snake!" just to take a wizz. Oh, by the way, I'm Harriet. Nice to meet all of you.